


i will be here when you come back

by Anonymous



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Future Fic, M/M, angsty
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-07-04
Updated: 2015-10-04
Packaged: 2018-04-07 15:32:40
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 2,885
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4268634
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>“Tsukki, that was a nice party, huh?” Yamaguchi murmurs sleepily. “I wonder when are we going to have that kind of party on our own…”</p><p>He glances at his lover tenderly, reaching out to caress the other's cheek. “Soon,”</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I'm in Tsukkiyama hell help. And a little warning since English isn't my forte so I'm not too confidence about this...

When they drive home from Kageyama and Hinata’s bachelor party, it was already midnight. The sky is as dark as it can get; the moon shines dimly and there’s hardly any star. The road is almost empty, the music blaring from the radio can practically be heard from afar. Yamaguchi giggles and sings along to the lyric, face flushed from the alcohol. Tsukishima thankfully is sober enough to drive a car.

“Tsukki, that was a nice party, huh?” Yamaguchi murmurs sleepily. “I wonder when are we going to have that kind of party on our own…”

He glances at his lover tenderly, reaching out to caress his cheek. “Soon,”

"Oh, are you going to propose soon?” Yamaguchi leans in closer to him, wriggling his eyebrows.

Tsukishima shrugs. “Maybe?”

“You are spoiling the thrill of anticipation!”

He grins when he bows down to meet his boyfriend’s lips in a quick chaste kiss.

“Mm,” Yamaguchi hums, capturing Tsukishima’s cheeks to pull him back down into the kiss.

“I’m driving here—“ he warns.

“It’s two in the morning Tsukki, what’s the worse can happen?“

"You're drunk," he states.

Yamaguchi giggles airily before his eyes flicker into the road where two huge headlights catches his attention. He squints. _It’s too bright, too close._

_Too close._

“Is that—" Yamaguchi gasps, unconsciously grabbing the front of Tsukishima's shirt. "Tsukki! Watch out—!”

A truck comes in their direction fast—faster than Tsukishima can react.

The sound of tires screeching splits through the night sky like lightning; followed by a loud crash.  He hears screaming. He smells gasoline and metal. And then all of the sudden—everything gone white and quiet.

He feels numb.

And then it’s pitch black.

 

 

Tsukishima jolts awake.

 

When he inhales through his mouth, a surge of pain washes all over his body and his head is throbbing like it’s about to burst open. All he sees are people he doesn’t know surrounding him in panic; Women dressed in white, a doctor. His wide eyes searching, but the person he’s looking for isn’t there.

“Where’s Tadashi?” he asks, quietly at first, ignoring the wet and sticky fluid rolling down his forehead.

Nobody answered.

“Is he okay?” He raises his voice, tasting steel inside of his mouth. Something warm drips from his fingertip.

“Where is Tadashi I need to see him now!” He tries to get up now, but unfamiliar faces are pushing him down, pinning his arms and legs to the bed. It hurts—his hands are numb and something cold runs through his arm.

“Tadashi!” He cries, struggling to break free from the grasps. They push him inside some kind of room—too bright for his eyes, but he can faintly hear beeping noises from behind him. 

“No—let go!! I need to see him—“ He tries to pull his hand away— _why is it so heavy_ —when something sharp makes its way through his skin.

 

 ****And then it’s pitch black once again.

 

Tsukishima wakes up with a gasp. Once he regains his senses, he stares blankly at the ceiling, his eyelids heavy and his everything hurts. When he sits up, his vision becomes blurry and he feels like throwing up. It doesn’t help with the fact that It smells like drugs and antiseptic in here. He scans the room, counting on the vacant beds surrounding him until he realizes that he’s alone.

 

_He’s alone._

 

But he wasn’t alone when the car crashed. He wasn’t alone when he drove home.

He screams for Yamaguchi’s name with every last strength he had, causing the heart rate alarm to go off. It takes only a few seconds for the nurses to come bursting into his room and put him back to sleep again.

He’s already used to the darkness by this point.

 


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> When he finally looks up again, Tadashi was already gone.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The warning on the first chapter still applies here!  
> andd it gets longer.

He sees him—his Tadashi, sitting down on their couch unharmed, unscathed. In his lap, their pet cat, Tama is curling herself into a ball, purring quietly. Tadashi smiles at him, waving at him to come closer.

Come closer? How? What separates them is an endless void of darkness. He looks down at his feet and staggers slightly at the nothingness underneath him.

 

When he finally looks up again, Tadashi was already gone.

 

 

Tsukishima stirs awake slowly this time. His eyes flutter open and it takes time to adjust himself to the brightness of the room. He turns his head from the side and was not expecting the see a group of people by the feet of his bed.

“Kei?” A voice reaches out to him—bringing him out of his daze. He squints to focus his eyes on the tall figure closing in to his side.

“Oh my god, he’s awake,” He knows that voice everywhere. He opens his mouth but nothing comes out. His throat is as dry as desert and it hurts just to try to say anything.

“Ah, Shouyou can you grab him something to drink?” Another voice. This time it’s calmer and more collected than the first.

“A-All right!”

Tsukishima tries to sit up using his elbows as support but Akiteru stops him.

“Hey, Kei, slow down buddy. Just, do me a favor and lay down for a bit.” Akiteru says, draping his fingers on Tsukishima’s shoulder.

Tsukishima lets out incoherent noises as he slides back down to his bed. He looks up at the ceiling mindlessly, his eyes still blurry. He takes his time to registers the dull pain in his head and the stinging feeling in his feet. Not long after that, another figure settles by his side, a water bottle in hand and his glasses on the other.

“Drink up,” they say softly.

He lifts his head and reaches out for the bottle when he spots the line on his hand, connected to an IV tube by his bed. He accepts the bottle from Hinata and drinks it recklessly. The water feels good against his parched throat thus he finishes it down in an instant. After that Hinata offers him his glasses.

“Better?” Akiteru asks him. He nods vaguely at his brother before looking straight at the group of people around him now that he can see clearly. At the end of his bed stood Kageyama and Sugawara, both looking sleep-deprived. He looks around once more just to make sure, but whom is he kidding? Of course Yamaguchi wouldn’t be here.

“Tsukishi—“ Hinata starts.

“Have,” Tsukishima cuts him off weakly. “Have any of you guys seen Tadashi?” his voice is rough and it still hurts to talk, but he doesn’t care. He has yet to receive any decent answer since the day he was admitted, and he wants an answer now.

 

The look on his friends’ faces is enough answer for him though.

 

Kageyama ducks his head with gritted teeth; Sugawara scrunches up his face into something akin to _pain_ , and color drains from Hinata’s face.

His brother bites on the inside his lips before inhaling sharply.

 

“What,” Tsukishima spats out. “Are you guys gonna answer me or what?”

“He’s…” surprisingly, Sugawara opens up his mouth first. “He’s currently in the ICU right now.”

 

Tsukishima stares at him, bewildered.

 

“Kei, you should rest—“ Akiteru says, reaching out his hand.

“Don’t touch me,” Tsukishima snarls, flinching away from his brother. He keeps his eyes locked with Sugawara’s.

“Go on.”

“The doctor said once he’s conscio—stable,” Sugawara stammers nervously. “They’ll bring him here at once.”

“He’s unconscious.” Tsukishima states.

“No—not for long, of course!” Hinata chirps in, earning a glare from the blonde.

“You’re not a doctor,” Tsukishima retorts, sweeping his gaze through everyone in the room. “No one here is a doctor, so none of you get to decide what’ll happen to Tadashi and what I should probably do.” He says, harsher than he intended it to be.

“Kei…”

He bows his head and rubs his face with his hands desperately before running them through his hair.

“Please leave me alone.” His voice comes out trembling.

“Kei, mom and dad are worried sick, and they’ve seen Tadashi too so you should—“

“Just… leave.”

Sugawara and Akiteru exchange glances before finally they step outside the room, followed by Kageyama.

Hinata stands by the door, looking down at his friend with teary eyes.

“I—I’m sorry.” He sniffles. “What happened to Tadashi and you—you can bla-blame me,”

“‘Course I will,” Tsukishima replies coldly, and that’s all it takes for Hinata to finally exits the room, sobbing.

Tsukishima fists his hair tightly, causing the wounds on his head to throb horribly.

He’d blame anyone, really. Hinata, Kageyama, hell, even Tanaka, who offered Yamaguchi a drink.

But deep down inside, he knows it’s none of those guys’ fault.

Yamaguchi is dying, and the fault is none but his own.

 

\--

 

His mother had come the next day, crying. Apparently neither Tsukishima nor Yamaguchi was conscious when she visited. She told Tsukishima about Yamaguchi’s condition; something he didn’t really want to hear, before leaving with his father before dark. Akiteru had stayed with him until late, but he knew his brother had work to do the next day, and so he urged him to leave.

 

And now that he’s alone, he prefers it this way than the other.

 

\--

 

Tsukishima never touch any of his foods, except for the sweets and cakes brought by his friends.

 

His doctor—a tall slim woman about his age—warns him continuously, but he still won’t eat anything but the desserts.

 

The nice old lady who’s in charge of picking up his food tray had asked him once, and he simply answered,

 

“I just don’t like hospital foods.”

 

The nurses have been frantic about his declining condition, but every time they forces something inside him, he’d just throws it up after few hours.

 

This, of course, doesn’t go unnoticed by Akiteru.

 

“Why won’t you eat anything, Kei?” Akiteru asks, genuinely concerned about his brother well being.

Tsukishima can easily spot the bags under his brother’s eyes, caused by his constant visit to the hospital and hectic work schedule. “I’ve eaten half of that tart Kiyoko gave me. And the pudding.”

“You know that’s not what I’m talking about.” Akiteru folds his arm and shakes his head.

“Then, could you tell Hinata to stop bringing cheesecakes? I don’t like them.”

“Kei.” Akiteru warns him.

Tsukishima gives Akiteru one last glance before looking away. “Are you seriously asking me that?” he snorts. “Tadashi is—god knows where Tadashi is right now but he’s alone and suffering and he might die any second now and you know that Aki, you know that better than anyone from the look in your eyes.” His breath hitches when he stops and he bites back a sob.

 

“He’s alone and _dying_ and I can’t even be there for him. How can I bring myself to eat anything knowing that? Even now—I feel like vomiting.”

 

Akiteru frowns. “All the more reason why you should eat.”

“What,”

“That’s why you should eat a lot and get better quickly so you could come visit him. So you could be there next to him when he woke up!” Akiteru raises his voice, to Tsukishima’s surprise.

“Do you think Tadashi would want to see you like this? Do you think he’ll be pleased when he sees you acting like a spoiled _brat?_ ”

“Aki-nii…” Tsukishima stares with wide eyes.

“So please,” His brother whispers. “Do him a favor. Get better. Be stronger. It _has_ to be you. Because up until now neither of his parents…” he trails off before shutting his mouth up.

Tsukishima looks down, and for once, he can’t come up with anything smart to say.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> why did it get so cheesy??


	3. fear

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tsukishima realizes that this isn't a mere crush anymore.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i lost the entire doc for this fic lmao.  
> and!! **This is a flashback chapter!!** set in their second years in highschool (aka 2 years of going out)  
>  at least you people deserve this much fluff after what I put through in the last two chapters.

Tsukishima has never believed that their relationship would work out.

After all, aren’t they just a pair of curious teenagers?

Even when their hands are linked together like this, never once has the doubt left his head.

“Tsukki, do you wanna grab some meatbuns?” Yamaguchi asks, swinging their intertwined hands back and forth. Beige worn out scarf covers almost the lower half of his face, and he has one hand hidden inside his pocket. Yamaguchi is never too fond of cold weather, but neither does Tsukishima.

“I just want to hurry up and go home,”

He gives Yamaguchi a sidelong glance before reverting back to the road in front of him. Yamaguchi lowers his head more and hides half of his face into the scarf. “Um, me too.” He whispers.

Tsukishima tries not to give in to a smirk when he notices a tinge of blush on the other boy’s ears.

 

\--

 

Tsukishima’s delicate hands help peel the scarf off of Yamaguchi’s neck.

He likes the feeling of undressing his boyfriend slowly. He also likes the way Yamaguchi’s skin glows red under his touch.

He is scared that someday; everything he feels will dissolve.

“It wouldn’t work out,” he murmurs unintentionally.

“Tsukki?” Yamaguchi looks up at him, wide eyes washed up with concern.

He stops the movement of his hands and looks straight into a pair of clear, unsuspecting eyes. He cups Yamaguchi’s cheek with one of his hand.

“Your skin is cold.” He says calmly.

“Well, aren’t you going to warm me up?” Yamaguchi beams at him.

The blond blinks owlishly before answering. “Can we just… talk? For a change?”

Yamaguchi’s toothy grin wavers before settling into something warm and understanding. “Sure, Tsukki.”

And that’s how the two of them ended up lying face to face on top of Tsukishima’s bed, with Yamaguchi hogging most of the blanket. Yamaguchi stares at him, searching.

“This is nice, for once in a while.” Yamaguchi breaks the comfortable silence, the smile still plastered on his face. He smiles a lot, Tsukishima notices. It’s not that Tsukishima is against it, actually, he likes it.

_But then one day, it’d disappear too, wouldn’t it._

Tsukishima isn’t sure where all his insecurities came from.

“We’ll be seniors by spring, huh.” Yamaguchi utters when Tsukishima doesn’t reply. “It’s scary how fast time passes by, right?”

Tsukishima rolls into his back before wheezing out an answer. “Yeah.” He can feel Yamaguchi’s curious gaze on him, but the boy remains silent.

“Yamaguchi.” He finally speaks. “What will become of us?” he asks the ceiling. “I mean—we’re both guys, and I wasn’t really expecting anything from the start.” He turns his head to the side, where Yamaguchi is watching him worriedly.

“We’re kids. We like to try out new things, you know. Maybe what we have—“

Tsukishima is cut off by a low chuckle. “I’m glad.”

“Huh?”

“I’m glad that I’m not the only who overthink things.” Yamaguchi sniggers. He shifts closer to the blond, tangling their messy limbs together. “But now that I know you’re just as pathetic as me,“

“Hey!” Tsukishima pouts.

“Heh heh.” The brunet laughs. “I’m not so scared anymore.”

Tsukishima raises his eyebrow.

“The future is important, I know. But what matters the most is the present, isn’t it? As in, right now.” Yamaguchi casts his eyes downward. “I only want to revel in this moment I have with you, and to be worried about what’s about to come is just a waste of time.

“Sure, as grown-ups everything will change, and people will get distant, but I’d still like to try—for us to be together. If it’s meant to be then it’s meant to be. But if it’s not… then God still have a bigger plan for you.” Yamaguchi smiles shyly, leaving Tsukishima dumbstruck. He reaches for the blonde’s shoulder as he climbs on top of him.

“I… I think I love you, Tsukki.” Yamaguchi mumbles while looking down on him. “But uh, I—I don’t know, I might be wrong.”

Tsukishima’s eyes widen before he snorts and laughs. “What kind of half-assed love confession was that?”

“Hey, come on. It was embarrassing.” Yamaguchi huffs, placing his palms flat on Tsukishima’s chest. “Don’t laugh!”

Tsukishima’s shoulders shake as he tries to suppress his laugh.

“Fine, then, ugh let me try again.” Yamaguchi rolls his eyes. He clears his throat before pulling the best confident look he has. “I can’t guarantee our future together nor can I promise you anything, but I want to spend every last day of it with you, Kei. Or at least, I’d like to try to make it work.” He mutters.

Tsukishima can’t help the wide grin that spreads on his face. “Where did you learn to say all those fancy words?”

“Apparently Noya-san isn’t as pitiful as he ought to be.” Yamaguchi beams.

“Well it was really cool.” Tsukishima brushes his fingers lightly on Yamaguchi’s jaw. “I hate it when you outran me.”

Yamaguchi lowers his head and pecks Tsukishima’s lips gently. “Well then, you better get used to it.”

 _I don’t want to get used to it._ Was what Tsukishima wanted to say, but instead he circles his arm around Yamaguchi’s neck to pull him closer.

They kiss, longer this time, and Tsukishima takes his time to appreciate all the little things he’s blessed with.

Tsukishima isn’t sure if what he’s feeling is love; he’s not as bold as Yamaguchi, and never was as brave as him. But one thing he knows for sure—this isn’t some friendly childhood crush anymore.

Even though the doubt has yet to leave his mind, and the thought of growing up still scares him, as long as Yamaguchi stays with him, he’ll manage.

\--

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> well, back to the main timeline. i wonder where yamaguchi is right now...

**Author's Note:**

> :D


End file.
